"Picture Hangers" by Valerie Amyot

Rusty metal hooks in the dining room’s white plaster wall,

evenly spaced,

once propping a painting

of the cozy cottage that my parents as a young couple

would go to every weekend.

I’m standing in my mother’s house, once my parent’s house,

and somewhere in-between,

our family home.

The painting now at my father’s place— 

(“it meant more to him anyways”)

a shared past now dislocated across separate spaces.

I can imagine the beginning:

fresh paint—the surprise that this painting was,

a gift mounted on the wall with precision and care,

witness to the young lovers’ first Christmas— 

warm lights and the glitter of tinsel,

the ring that promised something durable,

the painting a thoughtful gesture to immortalize

and cherish the time spent at the cottage

that was sold long ago—

or maybe just a piece of decor in a newly purchased home.

But then, the exhaustion of constant misalignment,

the lights that had somehow dimmed,

the bright oil of paint fading with time and frustration,

absorbing stony silences,

icy glares across the dining room table—

I swallowed resentment with every mouthful.

Now I visit my mom and sit where

I always sat growing up,

contemplating rusty metal hooks in a white plaster wall.

Valerie Amyot completed her bachelors and masters degrees in English Literature at Concordia University. She received the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council scholarship for her masters project entitled "Translation Across Difference: Transcultural Encounters in Gail Scott's Fiction", where she explored her research interests including feminist critical theory and anglo-québécois identity. Valerie has fond memories of her time at Concordia, which included working as the Academic Representative for the Student Association for Graduates in English. She has a book review on feminist theory and pedagogy that has recently been published in The Canadian Journal of Action Research. When she's not working as a teacher, tutor, and pedagogical advisor at a Montreal-based language company, she enjoys taking literature and creative writing courses at the Thomas More Institute and Quebec Writers' Federation, learning languages, exercising, reading and journaling.